Having resisted the idea for years, we finally fell for it. We now have a tuition teacher. Tuition teacher helps with review and homework of topics studied at school. But now we have a new problem. Who will help review and help with tuition homework given by the tuition teacher. I think I am going to get another teacher – the tuition tuition teacher who will help clarify the doubts raised by the tuition teacher who in turn will focus on doubts that are raised by school teacher. Since I proposed this idea, my kids are doubting my sanity. But no problems, I will get a sanity tuition teacher to clear doubts raised by kids about their parents.
This is going to work out so well that I am planning for a Bharatnatyam tuition teacher, a piano tuition teacher, a tennis tuition teacher and a basketball tuition teacher as well. Since I like the idea of home tuition, I am starting to invest in a dance studio at home, a music room with a grand piano, a full tennis court and a NBA size basketball court. I want the best for my kids. Since they will have doubts after these tuition classes, I will get tuition tuition teachers as well for bharatnatyam, piano, tennis and basketball.
Now the only doubt that I have is for my younger kid, should I get the tuition tuition teacher for cursive writing. You see the doubts that he originally had was in school, where the question was “Why should I write small ‘a’ six hundred thousand times, when doing it 10 times is enough?”. The tuition teacher replied that all important words in the world start with a. The answer was not convincing to my son and he gave an example that Dhoni starts with a d. Now the question has come to me. I know the answer but I have no time. I am a very busy professional. I think I will get a tuition tuition teacher for cursive writing and solve the problem forever.
Having decided this, I tried to create a calendar for the school classes, tuition classes, tuition tuition classes, sleeping and eating. It turns out that I need a 34.5 hour day. So I am changing the definition of a day from 24 hour to 34.5 hour. Now for us the day starts at 12 am and only finishes at 10.30 am the next day. Now all of us are happy, specially me as I now get to sleep 8 + 10.5 hours = 18.5 hours everyday.
And all of this is due to the tuition tuition teachers. All hail the concept of tuition.
About the Author: Ashwini Mathur is a resident of Hyderabad. In the past he has worked at GSK Pharmaceuticals as a Senior General Manager and at Novartis after that. He has a Master’s degree in Mathematics from IIT Delhi, a PhD in bio-statistics from University and College Berkeley, California and an executive MBA from IIM Bangalore.