The Child in My Father

Child in my Father

My mother and I were coming out of a store, and the sight we saw was one in a million. My father was standing in front of a stage when little kids were dancing, and he was dancing with them to the beat of their music with pure joy on his face. Before you think much let me describe my father. He’s a tall man with broad shoulders who looks very intimidating and the sharp spectacles resting on his nose only adds to it. But his smile is the winner and these I feel I see that smile very less.

There are tiny things which make him happy. The Sunday afternoon time when he enters the kitchen saying Aaj Khana Me banaunga because my mom had run out of ideas as to what to cook; and the crazy yet tasty meals he prepares. His love of shooting which he fulfills by Training students entering into various, state, and national level competitions in his free time. His vegetable garden which he has so lovingly grown and the joy he gets in sharing them with his neighbors. “It’s healthy organic food. Where else will you get such fresh vegetables?” is what he often says, and he is right as well. Whenever an article of mine is published, or the time my brother got his first salary. His face lit up with pride when he read my resume after just one year of college and I can never forget the way he proudly stands in front of his friends and colleagues whose kids study engineering, the field almost everyone in our family an friends circle is in, and say my daughter is doing arts an she is brilliant at it.

There are a lot of things in his life which worry or stress him. Be it his job, his kids, some regular stuff in life, but he still manages to flow happily through life. At this point, there is nothing that he lacks or lacks to give to us. I often ask him “Papa, don’t you want to do more in life, achieve more, be more than what you are?” and he always replies ” I’ve worked very hard and have now reached a place where I have no more wants. I am satisfied with all that I have achieved.” He is my inspiration, and he is my guide.

He is satisfied. It’s a stage in life which we all want to reach, but I fear we have confused what it means. We often chase money, fame, power, and knowledge, but we forget that after a point of gaining those they become more burdensome. There is no limit to our satisfaction, and we often spiral in sadness.  He has built up to his golden era and now just wants to enjoy life. When I see myself and people of my age I fear that we might not get to live in our golden era. We have forgotten the beautiful feeling of satisfaction and happiness. We live life in the fast lane always taking more, doing more, gaining more; be it money, fame, power or knowledge; but we need to learn when to stop so that we don’t burn ourselves out.

I distinctly remember Papa saying,” Take a break, you are working too much. You still have time. Go enjoy yourself.” And many times my only reply is “Just a little more papa then I’m done” but I know I’m not done. I have never been able to imagine a place in the future when I say I’m done, I am satisfied. But now think maybe I will. Seeing my father, I know, there is no end, and there never will be, we will always worry about something. But it is in my hands whether I want to enjoy my life along with work or just work myself to my bones dreaming about a life I might have in the future I will enjoy.

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