Close your eyes. Can you remember the time you were twelve years old and you experienced your first true puppy love?
Oh, how excited you were, how nervous you became when you saw that special person walk by or even look at you. The butterflies that raced instantaneously and rapidly through your stomach, the uncontrollable giggles that overwhelmed your maturity and the redness that covered your face.
You felt completely out of control and out of your attractive stance.
What did he think of you?
Did he see you as a funny, freckled, pigtailed geek? Or, was it possible that he felt the same way towards you?
You never knew exactly how the other person felt, unless you were told by one of your friends, but still you never heard it from the horse’s mouth.
I can recall a moment of sitting down in the grass out in front of my parent’s house with my two best friends. I had a yellow daisy in my right hand and with the other hand I picked off petals, one-by-one. With each petal I carefully picked it off, I would ask: “He loves me?” ” He loves me not?”
If the answer was he loves me not, that would be all right because I would pick up another daisy. Instead of considering that he might not love me, I would do this flower-research one more time. Well, actually, as many times as I had to until I had the right answer. Do you know what I mean?
Why not? Aren’t we told by mothers and fathers, “Don’s worry, just pick up where you started from; everything will be fine.”
“Don’t quit, just try harder! ” How can the outcome be exact? Who cares? As long as the lone petal said he loved me, why ponder it? It must be true. I mean, that’s the way love works, right?
If you love him, he must love you back. It’s just that simple, right? Not!
Through our years of experience, both good and bad, we were never able to get those words out of our heads. “Don’t quit, just try harder!”
Here we are in our twenties, thirties, forties and fifties. Still trying to make things work. Is it OKAY to quit? How can you make someone love you or be in love with you? Where are my fantasy-flowers of truth?
Since we are on the subject-matter of fantasies, I want to focus on the crucial difference between really caring and loving someone, and caring and loving a fantasy. I’m still trying to find the difference.
What people would be brave enough to initiate their feelings first?
How can you handle all those feelings and emotions, plus manage to concentrate on your school work?
An attempt at writing from the opposite gender’s point of view. Do let me know what you thought of it in the comments below.