Here is the charge sheet.
- He travels under aliases: Father Christmas, Father Pere Noel, Santa Claus, St Nicholas etc.
- Is guilty of illegal entry, as he never holds passport or visas or entry permits.
- Evades quarantine regulations.
- Smuggles in undeclared gifts across national frontiers.
- Always exceeds the duty free baggage.
- Violates air-traffic rules as he uses an uncertified and unlicensed `flying chariot drawn by reindeers to travel from place to place. And the plane is overloaded and hence breaks the safety regulations.
- He breaks the speed limit.
- His countenance is ever flushed. Has he imbibed too much wine and spirits? If so is he not flying a plane while under the influence of drinks?
- Don’t the jingles and the jangles of his vehicle and the bells on the neck of the reindeer and to the noise pollution?
- Will the SPCA take not of the cruelty that he subjects the reindeers to when he make them move at fantastic speeds over long distances, all in one night, without rest?
- He steals lady’s stockings regularly to stuff the gifts. Why does he prefer lady’s stockings? Is he then a pervert who has a gender bias?
Santa may plead NOT GUILTY. What’s your verdict?