WHY SILENCE THE VOICE OF YOUR SOUL – The voice of a woman

I am just like you, the one reading it.
A young woman in her twenties, not sure of love, not sure of her career, not sure of her life.
I am alternating between moods of bliss and depression!
I have nights that I dance to the loud music of the pub!
I have nights I cry to the silence of the night!
I have days when I have a crowd around me!

And there are days, when I fight the battle alone!
I live in my own  world of paradoxes!
Some days I am the strongest princess of my kingdom,
Someday I am the last broken piece of a disrupted life.

And one fine day, among the million voices around me, I heard a different voice.

A meek, subtle but strong voice.

I felt a ray of DEJAVU engulfing me!!!
I know the voice, I felt!
I have heard it before, I have felt the vibes before!!!
I have been hearing it!!

Everyone in our lives have heard it, which we so comfortably ignored because we knew it was the truth.
The truth so pure, straight from your soul, but the truth that you have ignored for all your life.
The truth that your soul kept reminding you of, but the truth that has been oppressed, suppressed by the fear of the society.
The truth of finding your voice among the loud dominating voices of injustice, grief and pain around.
The voice of your own soul!!!

Remember when the guy in your tenth standard abused you, called you names
Your voice told you to fight back.
But there you were, meek, shy and scared!

You silenced your voice.
You surrendered to his male domination, you surrendered to him!
You wanted to stand up for yourself, fight for yourself.
But all you did was walk away with tears in eyes and regrets in heart.

When the doctor you went for treatment touched you at wrong places in the name of inspection.
You knew he wasn’t inspecting you!
Your inner voice told you to push him away, confront him.
But there you were getting molested- silently.

Tolerating injustice when every bit of you wanted to fight back.
You tried to protest, you tried to scream but the “decent girl” that the society has transformed you into made you stay quiet.
Not a word, Not a tear!
Just quiet

When the bad guy in the bus took advantage of the crowded public and misbehaved with you.
There you were wanting to shout at the top of your voice “Stop it!! You can’t do that to me”!!
Your inner voice told you to stand up for yourself.
There you were “cautious, careful and decent”
Fearing to the people and the society.

So fearful of their perception!
So scared of their opinion!!
So worried about their judgment!!

When the boyfriend of yours was cheating on you and you knew it!!!
Your inner voice told you to end it!!!
But there you were
So broken, so hurt.

Still trying to save your relationship.
Still with a little hope,
Still with a little patience.
A little more!!

When the rightful husband of yours, forgot the rights he promised you,
And abused you, hit you and you were drained – emotionally and physically.
Your inner voice told you “You have tolerated enough ,its now time to walk out of it”
But there you were bound by the harsh norms and rules laid by the society!

Still trying to compromise.
Still trying to make a beautiful picture with  the last piece of a lost puzzle.

This article is not against males. This, in fact is not against anyone.
This is a voice to a lot of females out there, who have lost their voice of their soul.
Helpless, hopeless and broken.
All alone!!

Struggling to find a ray of light in the darkness.
Those whose soft voice has succumbed to the loud screams of agony, anarchy and domination.
Those who have surrendered, because in their mind, they have already lost the battle.
Those who have tolerated years of inequality, have been abused mentally and physically, with a soul so broken, still keeping the pieces together just to complete the journey of life for the sake of having started it.

To all the brave ladies out there,
STAND UP!!
For yourself,
For your body,
For your soul.

Stand up for the extra weight you have gained!!
Stand up for not being curvy!!
Stand up for not being as good as your neighbor aunt’s daughter in law!!
Stand up for not being as pretty as your husband’s colleague!!

Stand up against injustice!!!
Stand up against the pain you suffered!!
Stand up for walking out of a relationship and taking care of yourself!!
Stand up for divorcing your husband and being a single parent!!!!
Stand up against everything that breaks your soul and rips it apart!!!
Stand up against everything that kills you within.

Remember –

If it does not make you happy and doesn’t fill the hollow space between your ribs.
Nothing of that sort is worth keeping in your life!!!!!
 
Someday when that voice speaks to you, listen to it
Some words, Some music, Some talk or a walk!!
In some form it will convey you
What’s right and what’s wrong,
When to stop, what to stop.
Whom to love, whom not to.
Some day that voice will stand above all the screams around
That day you will stand up for yourself,
With your head held up high,
That day in spite of being the last broken piece of your disrupted life,
You will still be the strongest princess of your kingdom

About the Author: Rachan C Hegde is an alumnus of School of Allied Health Sciences, Manipal University. She is currently pursuing MBA in Hospital and Healthcare Management at Symbiosis International University, Pune!

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