An open letter to the people around me in Manipal

Dear,

Hairy guy roaming around hostel: Please go put on a shirt for Gods sake! You lost your right to go shirtless the moment the density of hair on your back became greater than that on your head!

Oddly alert Watchman: No I am not a non-hostelite and yes I am going to use my ID card to exit the hostel (since I clearly walked through the wall when I entered)

Rich Kid driving the pimped up car: Dude I get it, you are filthy rich!!! And cool ride by the way (just a piece of advise, drive like a human and DO NOT GET OUT OF THE CAR as that might just spoil everything)

Not so rich kid with a highly customized Bike: Bro, you doing your best but admit it, you won’t be as awesome as the guy with the pimped up car. Chicks dig cars. Maybe u can make it up with the extra speed and extra loud engines (Wait. Girls hate that)

Pretty girl at Shenoys: Damn girl!! You shouldn’t be out here distracting me. The way u eat Akka’s kachori sandwich… uff… even that leaves me feeling idiotically lovestruck

Despot guy checking out girls including my pretty girl: Stop it right now!! You my think you are discreet and all but they know it man, trust me they do!!  You really need to learn a few tricks which I will be glad to teach as long as you stay AWAY form my gal! Period.Leering at girls

Hulk at MARENA: Man, where do u come from!! Seriously, wtf!! You standing there with your dizzying height, chiseled pecs and glistening abs (a tad too gay?) making us puny creatures feel so inferior. BTW say hello to Iron Man.

Couple in a heavy makeout session in front of Chandrashekhar: Nope, do not mind us standing here gaping at you, Please continue you exchange of body fluids. After all we are in the medical field.

Nerd at the library: Friend, The books will be here tomorrow!! Please do not exhaust them tonight. You do know that your course is for four years and there is only so much a library can hold.Manipal Library

Snobbish waiter at Pangala: No I do not want the bill first and sorry “Sir” for taking 15 sec to read the menu.

Guy screaming into cellphone: Oh so your team is going to play football against MIT tomorrow? and Ben Affleck is the new batman? Yes that chick you banged was totally hot, and too bad your girlfriend dumped such a great guy like u… but seriously please keep the shit to yourself and spare us.

Random chick at DeeTee: Yes you are a hot babe and I would definitely love to “know” u better, but not while you are drunk. I don’t wanna end up with barf all over my place.Dominos Manipal

Dominos “bolt” delivery guy: How on earth do you manage to arrive at my doorstep at exactly the 29th minute!!! Do you have a certain teleportation system kept hidden from the rest of the world or is it apparition?

Begging-GirlBeggars at TC: You arer seriously wasting your time people, you are probably much richer than I am right now.

 

About the Author: DKS as he wants to be known is an alumnus of  Manipal University and wanted to share his thoughts on life in Manipal!

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  • Vishnu Nair

    Totally true bruh! Well written can totally relate!

  • Johnny

    I think I should start laughing now 🙂 Because I think I understood the joke 🙂

  • anonymous

    ????????