Somehow the problems of communication on the subject of sex still remain even in a time in which sex Is more open than it has ever been before. Smart Phones, Television, the internet, as well as all forms of media sometimes use people’s desire for sex to sell their products or get a message across. It has been used for a long, long time . . . but it is still effective.
In a survey of Manipal and Mangalore students, questions were asked to find out people’s opinions on sex. The questions were vague but the intention was to see how people would react to the questions and leaving the area of discussion wide open. On the journey across the two towns, the thought that people would not answer questions about sex openly or the thought that taboos of sex still existed with people seemed to bother me. Even though today it is more obvious what people will accept, I wondered if interviewees would keep their feelings hidden.
The questions started out with an inquiry about pre-marital sex. Women gave the best answers and were more balanced about the matter as compared to the quick cynical answer give by most men.
“What do you think about premarital sex?” was the first question asked. Of course. I explained to the girl to whom I was addressing that I was from ManipalBlog. She said, “I think it is OK, if you can handle it. ‘ Then went on to explain that a boyfriend must be involved. Usually, when interviewees answered the questions they implied or said complete sex as to the degree of pre-marital sex. “I believe that complete sex should wait until after marriage or “not in my life” were common as well as “I think it’s OK but I’d rather have an engagement ring.”
On the same question I got answers like: “I’ve never thought of marriage, but if I don’t have sex my body hurts,” said one male interviewee. Another quickly expressed opinion, “Nah, it just ain’t gonna work, that’s how Rome fell, interior degeneration.” I couldn’t tell if he was joking or not. But it sounded all right. A girl said, “I think it’s better than none at all?”
“Do you think many people have hang-ups about sex? “ came the next question I asked each interviewee.
Most people answered the question after a brief thought and usually said something like: “Oh sure, everyone has their hangups about something.” One answer was interesting to say the least—whether true or not—no comment. “There are different kinds of hangups. Some people have too much sex, some people have too little. Boys think they should have it all the time, girls say, ‘no. no.’
There were many answers from people who believe that the older generations have more hang-ups about sex, but weren’t specific about what they meant . Perhaps they were speaking about their parents accepting the young people’s “more liberated way.”
“Do you think that sex and love are interrelated?” was a question that got many varied and concise responses.
“Sex can be used for enjoyment, but love must be there,” said one girl. Another said, “Definitely, when I love a man I want to express love physically not only verbally. Besides being a serious romantic act, it’s fun!” “Sometimes it’s better if there isn’t always love but it’s better for me,” expressed another girl. Men usually said about the same as the girls, but were not as expressive.
“Do you think that the media has had an effect on the beliefs of the public about sex?” raised an interesting point of which people had a lot to say.
“I think that it has on many children. It exposes them in the wrong way.” “All those commercials that try to make people look young and sexy effect the older people, they get frustrated.” “I think that people started accepting sex first then the media began to capitalize on it.” This belief was held by many.
“Do you think sex is handled more open-minded today?”
“I think that it’s tolerated more,” expressed one person.
“Yes, it is a lot more today. Unmarried people can have sex and not worry about what other people say. It’s better to talk about it more freely. “Yes, it is handled more open-minded, but that doesn’t mean that it’s better. Because there is more talk doesn’t mean there aren’t as many hang-ups.”
When asked if they knew anyone who was living together with someone from the opposite sex, most people did know someone who was, or were living with someone already.
“I knew a couple who were living together, but now they’re married,” said one girl. “I think that it is good preparation for marriage. It’s kind of a trial period.”
“I knew a couple who were living together, but it was mostly for economic reasons, they had no intention of getting married.”
The sex survey given at Manipal and Mangalore was given on a one to one personal basis trying to be as general as possible. The people’s reaction to the survey seemed to be that of shock and joking at first but afterwards a very cooperative person who was responsive to questions. However, not everyone would answer my questions at all, not even jokingly.
Manipalites and Mangaloreans proved to me that people’s beliefs about sex are as varied as there are people. People can say the same thing but their meanings are so different. The movement towards the liberation of people to accept sex for what it is has been going on ever since I can remember and I’m sure it has been going on longer than that. It doesn’t seem all that easy to explain the reasons for having sex, but it is there, and hopefully to stay.
Have a nice night.